Not Your Usual “How to Look Cool” Blog Post

Image Credit: www.jokeroo.com

I know.

To some, topics like this have got to be the lamest. But hey, anything to make my brothers and sisters feel good about themselves. A pair of dark sunnies and faded jeans won’t do the trick. So before you go running to the wholesale sunglasses and wholesale jeans section of the department store, you may wanna give this a read:

Take a bath everyday. No really.

Practice good hygiene…please.

Not doing so is a sure fire way to lose a ton of friends. Always try to look, feel and smell clean. Be sure you are neat and presentable whenever you’re out. I mean – even if it’s not your style – you could be rugged and tidy, right?

When I say clean, I mean clean everything. Don’t forget to trim your fingernails, clean your teeth, style your hair, wash your ego, the works.

Go to the gym and don’t just lift.

“As long as I am with my boyfriend who’s into plyos, I can go anywhere feeling safe.”

- Says no lady.

Really, core strength and mere pumping iron won’t get you very far on the street. I mean, sure Herculean traps can intimidate. But only those who know nothing about fighting. Mad skills are what you need. I’m just saying it is good to arm yourself with some self-defense know-how to boost your confidence, keep yourself fit, and be able to kick bad people’s butts.

Be yourself.
Unless you’re one of those guys from One Direction.

I’m sure you hear that a lot. I mean, both statements.

Really, there is absolutely no point in trying to be someone you’re not. I mean, you can’t smirk all the time the way the late, great Johnny Cash used to do. Sooner or later people are gonna notice and they will start to unlike you for trying too hard. That, or at one time you forgot to bring your Johnny Cash persona with you and instead of showing the “sexy” Johnny Cash smirk you showed your natural smirk and it offended people.

Smile!

Smile at the lady at the fast food counter. Smile at the guards at the mall. Smile at your boss even if he keeps on asking why you’re late even though he always arrives ten minutes later than you do.

But don’t overdo it that it gets annoying. I mean, don’t just smile at the officer who asked you to pull over. Ask first what your violation is… and then smile as if you’re buddies. A smile spews a sunny disposition. Sometimes it’s all you need to patch things up with your wife.

That and a day’s worth of shopping money.